Author Archives: diva

A Few Good Sperm

Q: Hi there, My partner and I have been together 8 years–our anniversary is this week– Yeah!!! Celebration time!!! We’re ready to start our family, and decided to go the “known donor” route so the child would be able to have some awareness of who their biological father is…
Here’s the problem: none of the men we’ve approached (and don’t misunderstand, they’ve all been pretty together, gay-positive men) have been able to “handle the idea”. They say things like “How could I handle having a child, but not really being a father”, or “I would feel too responsible to the child”. Geez, where are all the totally irresponsible men I dated before I figured out who I really am? They were only too happy to let ME worry about contraception back then.
Why have the rules changed now? Talk about irony. We spend half our fertile lives before we’re mature enough to know who we are and what we want trying NOT to get pregnant and the other half trying desperately trying to. Sometimes, life sucks!

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Posted in Family & Parenting | Comments Off


Q: I guess I should start off by saying that I am a transsexual. Even though I was born male and have done “boy” things, I’ve always felt like a girl on the inside, and dreamed about being a girl on the outside. However, I’m so uncertain about transitioning. I’m so afraid. Will I become an outcast? Will I ever meet someone who would want me for a companion? Its just such a big decision, and a big step. And yet, being 19, everyone I’ve talked to (both TS and non-TS) tell me that if I’m going to transition, I should do it now before it is “too late”. I guess I just need some advice about where to go from here. Everyday I get really depressed. All I can think about is transitioning. Yet I’m afraid that the reality of being a transitioned TS will be worse than what I am now. A person who is in the wrong body.
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Posted in Gender Identity | 3 Comments

Little Boy Blues

Q: I’ve met this guy, and we both have a lot in common, and neither of us have had a relationship with anyone, (we’re only teenagers) and I want to know what I should do if I want him, and how to go about it, where to meet, how to find out if he wants me too? Please help!!!
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Posted in The School Years | Comments Off

Stand By Your Man

Q: I am a 43-year old gay male who has been in a loving, stable, monogamous relationship with George for the past 17 years. In fact, we celebrated our 15th anniversary with a Holy Union, performed at our church (Morning Star MCC).
My problem (I should say “our” problem) stems from some of the other males who try to “cop a feel” and on one occasion, tried to get us to separate. We have tried talking with these people. We have tried public humiliation, and (unfortunately) even a sharp slap across the face (after a rather painful crotch grab).
Some of these people STILL refuse to believe that we are a couple who are in love with each other and will be forever. I guess my question is, how can we make these people stop bothering us?

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Posted in Long-Term Relationships | Comments Off

…something about a loveseat

Q: I met this girl. She lives in texas and we were talked every night on the phone for three months. I had told her two very petty fibs and when she came to visit, the fibs came out. I also told her I loved her. She left after six days. She was supposed to stay for two weeks. Well, after a few days I got an email from her saying that she just wanted to be friends for now and that she wanted me to wait and see what happens after the summer. I am not sure how to handle this. I truly care for her and I believe she cares for me, so what should I do?
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Posted in Dating & New Relationships | Comments Off

Pitch a Tent or Take a Hike?

Q: I’ve been seeing this girl for a few weeks. I met her on a personals page. Ever since we met things have been going great and everytime I see her she makes me so happy, but b/c of her last g/f she says shes not ready to jump into anything. We have been very physical with each other, and I find myself doing more and more things for her. It’s not that she’s not appreciative, but I sort of feel that if she can sleep with me, let me do things for her, and even cry on my shoulder why can’t she take a risk and try things seriously with me? I’m not seeing anyone else, and I know she’s not either, recently she told me to step back a little and stop doing things for her because it makes her feel uncomfortable…I am going to try and do that but I’m falling hard for her and don’t know whether I should just give up or hang around hoping she’ll work through her stuff and want to be with me. Please help.
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Posted in Dating & New Relationships | Comments Off

Libi-Do or Libi-Don’t?

Q: I have been in a relationship for almost 2 years. My partner and I are in a committed relationship. My problem is that our sex drives are completely different. I love her and love being with her but sometimes it seems like she is more interested in having a friend than a lover. I feel used and alone.
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Posted in Sex, Sex, Sex | 1 Comment

Slings, Arrows & Booty Calls

Q: My heart was broken, and I can’t get over it. I keep hookin up wit lots of chicky’s but they are hardly the thing to fill my void, what will help?
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Posted in Breaking Up is Hard to Do | 1 Comment

Mirror, Mirror

Q:  I know I’m good looking… but when I see a hot babe I think that she must be feeling superior to me; and if she is nice to me and flirts I think she is doing it to be nice. No matter how many people tell me I’m hot I still think other hot babes are more secure. Don’t hot babes have insecurities like me?
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Posted in Body Image | Comments Off

I do. Do you?

Q: I want to know if, like you’ve had a friend for about five years and your a bi then how would you ask her to marry you? Because I am totally in love with my best friend and she doesn’t even know I am a bi. Thanks for reading this.
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Posted in Friends & Queer-mmunity | Comments Off