Q: I am a 43-year old gay male who has been in a loving, stable, monogamous relationship with my partner for the past 17 years. In fact, we celebrated our 15th anniversary with a Holy Union, performed at our church (Morning Star MCC).
My problem (I should say “our” problem) stems from some of the other males who try to “cop a feel” and on one occasion, tried to get us to separate. We have tried talking with these people. We have tried public humiliation, and (unfortunately) even a sharp slap across the face (after a rather painful crotch grab).
Some of these people STILL refuse to believe that we are a couple who are in love with each other and will be forever. I guess my question is, how can we make these people stop bothering us?
Diva Says: Good lord, where are you two hanging out? I can tell you every gay barstool this side of Queeratia has a lap-load of catty kings and queens who just can’t stand to see something pure that doesn’t have an olive floating in it. Maybe you two are smooching at the wrong soiree?
It sounds as if you’ve made your love for each other quite obvious, what with the honesty of your words and the aggressive measures taken (i.e. the slap). And I must say it’s heartwarming to hear of your commitment ceremony at MCC. Congratulations!
I can only give you one answer… If people refuse to accept your relationship with your lover.. then perhaps it’s best to stop going to the places where they are, or to simply avoid the individuals themselves. Respect is ever so important, even just in friendship. If your friends cannot respect your relationship, then they do not respect you, and simply put… You can’t change your friends, you can only change yourselves.
I wish you luck!