Q: HHMMM..I’ve been having these rather disturbing erotic dreams with (shreek,scream!) MEN in them, and even more upsetting…I’m having a fabulous time playing penis gymnastics. Problems is, I’m a happily attached lesbian of 5 years and more than happy with our sex life. I tell my partner the dreams because I feel so damn guilty, and she has begun worrying that I’m going to run off with some MAN ( huh!) Is this fairly common? Is it a case of dreaming about want I can’t have or are they really nightmares????????? Please help!
Diva Says: First, let me applaud you for telling your partner. Takes guts to be that honest, especially where such dramatic “switches” are concerned.
Second, let me ease your mind. I’m of the opinion that everyone is born at least a percentage bisexual. Some tilt the scales in either direction and some lay more towards the middle – but regardless, we all have curiosities now and again. Your dreams are natural, and they’ll probably happen from time to time. I’ve never been with a man, nor do I have any desire to do so, but I’ve had the occasional heterosexual wet dream myself. That doesn’t mean that I have intention of acting them out in real life, but I’d be lying if I said I’d never even entertained a curiosity.
Sexuality is a fluid thing. What constitutes your orientation isn’t so much a leaning towards genitalia, but towards the psyche of the individual, or group of individuals, that register on your emotional and sexual richter scale.
Don’t be ashamed of your recent genital fixations. Instead, perhaps it’s time you and your partner made a trip to the “toy store” and spiced up your sex life a bit. Men aren’t the only ones who can have a penis, you know. This could be a chance for you and your partner to take your sex life to a new level, and doing so might ease your partners’ mind a bit.
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Good luck to you!