Q: Here’s the situation: Recently I have noticed my best friend getting “fresh” with me. She claims she is straight, but I know she is a bit curious. She told me she is scared about being with me in that way because she has never done that kind of thing before. She knows that I am a full pledged bi and she seems to be comfortable with it. My question is should I show her the beauties of this wonderful lifestyle or tell her to stop these childish games nicely.
Diva Says: Let’s take it down a level, dearheart.
Try this: Remove the sexuality & gender issues from the picture and then step back and take and look at it again. Two people. Friends. Best Friends. One is curious and confused. One is (seemingly) apathetic. Neither seem to have any truly romantic feelings toward the other – just sexual tension. Now, I pose the question – Is a roll in the sack worth the awkwardness of the morning after?
But then again – if you two can share that and not have any of that awkwardness, why not? It’s a rare friendship that can survive the transition without crumbling a bit, but it surely is possible.
In either case – perhaps your “tutoring” of her in this arena can be non-sexual. Be the best friend that you have always been, talk with her about it, give her books to read – maybe even set her up on a blind-date! (And if there’s a twinge of jealousy at that thought, perhaps you should re-think your position a bit and worry less about what she needs, and more about what *you* want…)
Either way, it’s not an issue of sexual orientation – it’s a simple question of, can a friendship survive sex? And that, my darling – I can’t answer for you.